The start of the new year has packed in a lot of craziness. Although, with our life, I don't know why I would expect anything else ( : Here is an update on the mulitple things that are happening (or not happening):
1) We still have yet to sign for a place. We have about 20 days to move and so far, nothing is in writing.We have passed on a few deifferent places for no other reason than just not feeling at peace with it. This has required trust, as we literally have had nothing else on our list at the time. But, as we have learned, we don't always know God's plans, but we have come to understand the peace that comes when you are moving according to His will. We BELIEVE that God will give us that as we strive to daily be where He wants us to be. There is a little something in the works, but it is all very preliminary (be praying it works).
2) The biggest change is that we got a surprise call this morning from our nurse that the heart team discussed Jackson's case at their surgical conference this morning ( a month earlier than we were told they would), and that they would like a MRI to be done to look closer at the right ventricle function. The basic consensus is this: A team full of brillant minds is not in agreement with what the plan should be for Jackson.... worst feeling in the world as a parent. Basically, there are some around the table that say that the risk for his surgery is too high and that we should wait to see how far in life he can go before something is needed. Then there are some that say that although the risk is high, the chance at a longer lifespan is worth it. They argue that doing something now while his stats are stable is the best opportunity.
This is all summed up very generally, there is a lot of information behind all of this. The type of information that makes you hurt behind belief. As a parent to know that either road you choose comes with very high risks and very unknown outcomes is like a heavy burden that feels unbearable.
Good thing we have an awesome God to toss that burden on!!! It's not easy, but we are believing that God will continue to direct us as parents and give us peace to know which decision is best for Jackson. We have been given a great team of care here, one that looks at Jackson's life from every angle. We feel confident that as we continue to move forward with these next steps that God will give us wisdom beyond anything to confirm the very best for our little guy.
Chris and I are starting a 21 days fast on the 10th. We truly are clinging to God for everything. When there is confusion, doubt and uncertainity.... "When you don't know what to do, do what you know." As we stive to figure out our finances, our living situation, and Jackson's line of care, we will continue to do what we know. To run after Him who first loved us. To pray, to give, to fast, to seek, to share, and to love. We are excited to see how God teaches us and restores us in the next few weeks!