Saturday, September 17, 2011

September 14, 2011 (Day 7 after birth) Perfect Moment

September 7, 2011, rolled around and we found ourselves getting ready in the morning to head in for our planned c-section at 11:30. I thought I would be more emotional but I found myself unusually calm considering our conditions. Chris and I took time to pray together asking God for specific things that had been laid on our heart. One of the biggest prayers was that we would be able to track Jackson’s heart well enough that they would cancel the c-section and allow me to deliver him. We knew it was a long shot because we really weren’t able to get a good reading when we tried any of the times before, but we knew God was mighty enough to cover this area.
 We showed up at the hospital on time and got hooked up to the machines. We ran almost a perfect tracking of his heart for over 30 minutes and waited desperately for an answer from our doctor on what he thought. It was a little after 11 that they decided to let me go forward with a vaginal delivery. We were transferred to a room, an epidural put in, my water broke, and then we waited. My epidural wasn’t a choice, but they had to get me fully prepped in case we needed to rush in for an emergency c-section if his heart did not tolerate the labor process. We cruised through the labor process with the whole thing taking only 2 hours total from my water breaking to having a baby. My doctor came in at 2:00 to see our progress and said, “Ok, we are ready for a baby.” In that moment it was like someone paused my life. As my doctor walked out of the room to prep the team for Jackson, I began to weep uncontrollably. My husband was awesome at just being there to comfort me and hold my hand.

It was almost as if I felt like I had just walked out of our first appointment where we found out about his heart and then someone just pushed fast forward through all of our most difficult times and pushed play on the moment that we had been waiting for. I felt a mixture of extreme excitement and fear of the unknown at the same time. I just kept thinking about his little heart and if it would be strong enough. All the waiting time and we were finally here, the moment I had been fighting for.

Only four minutes of pushing and he was out. Pain free, peaceful, and incredible. He came out kicking and screaming, a sound I will never forget. I got a small glimpse of him before he was rushed out to be hooked up to all the monitors. Chris followed with him and for a little bit of time I laid there in bed wondering what was happening. Was he ok? What did he look like? Was Chris taking enough pictures for me? And then the moment came. The door opened and I watched as they carried him through the doorway all swaddled up. I didn’t expect to be able to hold him that soon, so I was shocked when he was placed in my arms.  He was perfect. The moment was perfect. It was everything I had dreamed it would be.  I didn’t know if we would ever be able to hold him that way and everything in me just felt complete joy.  I only got a few minutes with him before they took him up to CVICU, but in those moments it was if the world stood still. There have been great moments in my life, but none as great as that! Welcome to the world Jackson Oliver!

1 comment:

  1. Amazing! Praise God for letting you deliver this way so that you could hold him and kiss hime! Yay!